A Thing to Consider, Part 1

Hello, my students.

You may have noticed my silence over these past few months. I will attempt to remedy this, not the least because someone actually left a comment, proving that, on occasion, people may actually read this. It may be because they heard about it from me, or decided for whatever reason to Google a cheap source of slave labor to build their death ray, or it may be because they just happened to click on the wrong link.

I don't care. Views are views.

Apologies over. Moving on...

The topic I've chosen to address in today's lesson is one that I may or may not have briefly addressed before, and that is this:

What is the proper etiquette for telling your Overlord that you wish to leave?

Of course, the easiest, and often safest way, is not to tell him at all. We will discuss this more in the second part of this class.

First of all, there are things to consider. Namely, why are you leaving in the first place?

Often the Overlord is simply insane. This is not necessarily a bad thing; most of the best villains are. However, if you begin to fear for your sanity - you are, simply put, in the wrong line of work.

Telling your Overlord this, though, if he is likely to go into a psychotic rage, can be an intimidating prospect. There are several ideal situations. For example, if I were faced with such a situation, my dialogue would probably go something like this, to borrow from Sir Terry Pratchett:

Hypothetical Me: "Permission to leave for grandmother's funeral?"

Hypothetical Overlord: "Why?"

Hypothetical Me: "It's her or me."

Or, if that sounds like the perfect way to get yourself smote, try simply lying and telling him you're going somewhere else.

You can also tell your Overlord exactly why you want to leave. Perhaps you'll catch him in a good mood, and he'll let you go with nothing but a generous severance package. Unfortunately, sometimes you'll catch him in a less good mood, and he'll let you go with a less-than-generous severance package (sometimes it's best not to imagine what precisely is being severed).

So honestly is not always the best policy.


Which brings us to another possible reason for your desire to leave evil service: Morals. Perhaps you have decided to leave because you don't feel comfortable serving evil any longer.

Leave immediately, and without any attempts to persuade your former Overlord from his wicked ways. There's plenty of time for that via email or long-distance phone calls. I will not address this very much, for the simple reason that chances of survival for you aren't so great.


Good luck, and this topic should return with the next lesson.

As always, go darken the world like a little shadow of evil.

~Headmistress Darke